{"id":30859,"date":"2019-12-09T17:29:42","date_gmt":"2019-12-10T01:29:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/allsolutionsnetwork.org\/blog\/?p=30859"},"modified":"2019-12-10T15:14:24","modified_gmt":"2019-12-10T23:14:24","slug":"you-are-a-redneck-when","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/allsolutionsnetwork.org\/blog\/you-are-a-redneck-when\/","title":{"rendered":"You are a redneck when…"},"content":{"rendered":"\r\n

1.\u00a0 You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.<\/span>
<\/span>\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>2.\u00a0 The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it…\u00a0<\/span><\/span>\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>3.\u00a0 You\u2019ve been married three times and still have the same in-laws.<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>4.\u00a0 You think a woman who is out of your league bowls on a different night.<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>5.\u00a0 You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>6.\u00a0 Someone in your family died right after saying, \u2018Hey, guys, watch this.\u2019<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>7.\u00a0 You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>8.\u00a0 Your wife\u2019s hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>9.\u00a0 Your junior prom offered day care.<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>10. You think the last words of the Star-Spangled Banner are \u2018Gentlemen, start your engines.\u2019<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.<\/span>
<\/span>
<\/span>14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>15. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>16. You can\u2019t get married to your sweetheart because there\u2019s a law against\u00a0 it.<\/span>
\u00a0<\/span>
<\/span>17. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.<\/span>
<\/span><\/span><\/span>And in closing….<\/span>
<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>Two good ol\u2019 boys in a Alabama trailer park were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer after getting off work at the local Nissan plant.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\r\n

After a while the 1st guy says to the 2nd, \u201cIf\u2019n I was to sneak over to your trailer Saturday & make love to your wife while you was off huntin\u2019 and she got pregnant and had a baby, would that make us kin?\u201d<\/span><\/span><\/p>\r\n

The 2nd guy crooked his head sideways for a minute, scratched his head and squinted his eyes thinking real hard about the question. Finally, he says, \u201cWell, I don\u2019t know about kin, but it would make us even!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\r\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

1.\u00a0 You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.\u00a0\u00a02.\u00a0 The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it…\u00a0\u00a03.\u00a0 You\u2019ve been married three times and still have the same in-laws.\u00a04.\u00a0 You think a woman who is out of your […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[3,1],"tags":[48],"class_list":["post-30859","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-jokesandhumor","category-uncategorized","tag-redneck-humor-jokes"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2EGlL-81J","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/allsolutionsnetwork.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30859","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/allsolutionsnetwork.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/allsolutionsnetwork.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/allsolutionsnetwork.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/allsolutionsnetwork.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=30859"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/allsolutionsnetwork.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30859\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":30879,"href":"https:\/\/allsolutionsnetwork.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30859\/revisions\/30879"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/allsolutionsnetwork.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=30859"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/allsolutionsnetwork.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=30859"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/allsolutionsnetwork.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=30859"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}